Shy People Suck

I hate when shy people are upset or hurt by something. Because they don't/won't say that something is wrong, even if they hate you.

Like my friend Steven. He never speaks up for himself & is usually quiet and agreeable.

But I constantly feel like he hates me or thinks some of the things I believe are stupid.
If he read that, he would insist that it was not true even if it were. It is awesome that he cares and is a people-pleaser, but when he won't speak his mind, it makes me worry.

I should not be so tantalized by one friend, but I am. I need people to tell me when they are bothered (whine if you must). You needn't tell everyone else if you are shy, but please stop mentally tormenting me.
Not just Steven. The world. Other friends.
Secrets cause cancer.

Crisis averted!

I told the lady I didn't want it, she said that it wasn't my choice, but told me to talk to my mom.

I told my mom I had gotten it, they all got vaccinated. I still have my paper...

I have no rights, but am very sneaky. Hooray!

Swine Flu Vaccination and Why it is Bad

The vaccine many people are so ready to inject into their fragile bodies is made with the dead virus. This vaccine, which is being used on infants, contains ingredients such as mercury and is perfectly comparable to the 1976 vaccine that caused paralysis and a slew of other serious problems.

Worse, we are giving it to billions of people untested!

This vaccine could cause swine flu instead of stop it, it could cause permanent paralysis and it could kill people!

The Baxter Drug company is still distributing this vaccine, dispite the risks. And they are making a ton of money. They recieved a short-term patent on the vaccine. a look at this patent should tell any sane person to avoid this vaccine like the plague:
“Suitable adjuvants can be selected from mineral gels,
aluminum hydroxide, surface active substances, lysolecithin,
pluronic polyols, polyanions or oil emulsions such as water in
oil or oil in water, or a combination thereof. Of course the
selection of the adjuvant depends on the intended use.
E.g. toxicity may depend on the destined subject organism
and can vary from no toxicity to high toxicity.”

It allows for a dangerously high toxicity. The adjuvant called MF-59 Contains SQUALENE, a chemical known to cause Lupus, Multiple Sclerosis
Rheumatoid Arthritis, and immune issues. MF-59 killed 13 out of 14 animals on which it was tested. It is not approved by the FDA for use. And yet this vaccine, containing this banned ingredient, is approved for use on our children! The future generation of our planet is being subjected to destructive chemicals and drugs that can and will cause them to be disabled.

With our economy going down the drain we cannot afford to lose the workers of tomorrow to a deadly and untested vaccine similar to the anthrax vaccine used on Vietman soldiers (who are now suffering because of the vaccine).

Think this over, what is in the vaccine?
1. Virus
2. MF-59, a drug that weakens the immune system and caused disease.
3. Mercury, a chemical that forms precipitates in the brain and destroys brain tissue, leading to all sorts of mental and sensory problems and often death in younger individuals
4. Aluminum - shown to cause Alzheimer's and toxicity


This virus will do what the anthrax virus did to our veterans - it will cause ALS, Lupus, Transverse Myelitis, Blindness and other problems. It will turn a healthy person into a sick one. It will destroy our children and our elderly and it will not protect us from swine flu or any other virus that comes along.

Violence is bad

Care to guess why?
Before you give me WWJD or 'because God said so' or 'because Jesus never punched anyone in the face,' let's think with logic:

1. It causes bodily harm. Bodily harm is bad.
2. It is not refined. Unless you are a master fencer, what you are doing is ugly. There is no honor in hitting or shooting or bombing.
3. Police involvement generally hinders you later in life.
4. Karma, Man! You reap what you sow. And you sowed getting your butt kicked.
5. An act of violence takes more energy than any of its productive counterparts. And let's face it, you need all that energy for other things, like procreation, or making new blood if you bleed out (which brings me back to bodily harm)

5 good reasons.Do with them what you will/won't

Bonfire Fun

The band bonfire was awesome...
I learned to dance from Daniel Fernandez...
That's really it.
I love how he can dance and have fun with no worries as to what other people think of his bizzare dancing.

One day, my friend, you will be a street performer.

The band season ends as it begins: firey (starting with band camp, ending with the fire)

The band bonfire is for fun, friends, and setting our props aflame. We had an amazing time and now band is foreves gone.

My mother just told me that I brag too much.
If only she knew how I really felt! If she knew how much I hate myself most of the time she would be glad I could smile and say positive things - even if I know those things are false.

The modern parent either needs to be more aware of their kids' feelings/life... Or less condescending.

It is too late for my parents, but hopefully this next generation parents do not turn out like my mother.

Dear Steven (my poor shy friend),
Even if you weren't adorable, we would want to be seen with you. Even if you couldn't carry a tune in a bucket, we would still want to hear your voice. Even if we didn't need you, we would still want you. Even if you never got hyper, and stayed sleepy all day, we would still want to hang out with you.

And though you blush and protest, the fact remains that you are amazing. You always look perfect, even when you think you don't. I stop breathing when you sing - your voice is that good. You are not just an energy source, you are a friend. A truer one than any I have ever had. And I wish you could see it. Smile. And ask for what you want, even if it is to be away from me. Because you are amazing, even if you can't see it.

I am going to tell my children/grandchildren about this. I can imagine the story now:

Well, i had eaten a lot of food & since i was a dancer i needed to stay thin. So I took some pills to get it all out of me. Long story short: I had explosive diarrhea for 2 days straight.

I hope they never become this obsessed with their looks.
Also it is just a fun story...

Bad Ideas...

Never take laxitives to lose weight.

I took them last night & expected them 2 work as fast as usual, but no, it worked as i was working in my college's library & throughout the day. My tummy hurt & i kept having 2 poo & ppl smelled all the fartness.

Plus i had explosive diarrhea in a public restroom. I was like those ppl who u hear/smell when u go in & you wonder what they ate.
I ate laxitives. Sorry for the smell.

Scene is Sexy (when you do it so well)

My boyfriend is undoubtably the manliest guy I know. 100 lbs, 5'3 and donning hot pink skinny jeans and scene hair, he is an actor - the director said he wasn't macho enough for the lead this time. Everywhere he goes people call him gay, a fag, queer, and other gay slurs. He smiles, says thanks, and prances off. No matter how gay or weird he seems he keeps doing what he wants and driving his powder blue Prius, blaring Jeffree Star's Beauty Killer.

And maybe his flamboyant self-expression has taught me to let loose a little. After all, it takes a real man to pull of pink&blue zebra striped skinny jeans, particularly if he is holding hands with a girl in a matching pair.

New words in the English language

A friend and i realized that the use of the word I'm and Amn't are both good for expressing 'I am not.' This lead to the creation of a new word: I'mn't, in the style of Edwardian word-shortening.
I'mn't sure if Shakespeare would have used the word, but hey, it's here, it's a little queer, but it's going to catch on, so get used to it!

Also there has been a long debate over the word Grey (or Gray). We have settled this debate with a simple excercise in logic:
Grey
Gray
Cancel out the Y's, and what you get is: Grae. pronounced the same way that Gray or Grey would have been pronounced, but ten times as amazing. use it next time you need to express that pesky colour between black and white!

What will Aerosmith do without Steven Tyler? He left them and that should worry us.
How can they survive? Everyone knows that Steven Tyler's lips are the source of Aerosmith's power!

Today was my last performance of the 2009 marching band show - my last show of highschool and my final performance of my solo.

I don't know how to feel. Just...the thing that took my soul for four years suddenly gave it back and now it feels weird to have a soul, free time, and 130 less friends.
I just hope i can remember the times, good and bad. To the band class of 2010, rock on!